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Friday, October 25, 2013

Tomorrow Never Dies

Keep in mind as you read this review that I have written over 1,000 movie reviews. I also spent one year on staff at a local Christian college newspaper (where I had a movie review column.) and oh yea I have at least three books in my home library on the 007 movie series. That being said let’s get on with this review. This may be the most far-fetched story ever written. It possibly contains unfathomable plot ever put to paper, and has the most impossible action sequence(s) Ever scene on the big screen. (James Bond series or otherwise.) Let me tell you the alleged plot of this weak weak film. One man who runs an internet newspaper in 1997 mind you (the early daze of the world wide web) attempts to create war and havoc with non feuding countries by undermining their trust for one another by blowing them up with magic satellites and manufactured missiles that NO GOVERNMENT has ever scene of heard about or even detected. I cannot walk into the local 7-11 with out being scene on camera. Yet somehow somebody can undermine world peace with a few “unknown” satellites. Oh but wait there is an invisible BMW ready to carry James Bond away from some under layer fortress across a sea of ice while being chase by a giant sunray! Seriously did anybody proofread this story before it made the screenwriters desk? To make things worse the lead female in this film is Terri Hatcher who played Lois Lane on the small screen so she may know something about good writing and good newspapers. The sad part is she did not even get top billing in this horrid film. That honor went to Jonathan Price the male villain eluded to earlier in this review. It is no wonder it took me several viewings and 15 years to write a review for this deplorable film! In case you have not noticed I despised this movie! It was poorly written, completely far fetched and not well billed to boot. See this only if you need to vomit up your mother in laws undercooked meatloaf. The salmonella effect and food poisoning and may leave better feeling in your stomach than this film Grade F

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A note from an editor!

Hi Matthew,

Thank you for the time and effort you put into this piece, especially on a Saturday morning. I can tell you definitely took good notes of everything that was going on during the event!

We still have some work to do before this piece is ready to print. Your piece has a lot of information, but it doesn’t sound like a news article. What was the point of his speech/presentation? Why was he addressing this audience? What is Vanguard? What does the company do – who does it serve? You spend a lot of time narrating (for example, how he was injured), but did not report on the purpose of the event. You can maybe mention his appearance/joking about it in a sentence or two, but do not take several paragraphs to do so. Also, I like how you mentioned where the name “Vanguard” comes from.

There are a lot of spelling errors in this piece – make sure you proof read each sentence carefully.

I know I am getting back to you a little later I hoped, and I’m sorry about that! But if you have time tonight, please go through my suggestions and try to rework your piece. You can send me what you have tonight/tomorrow morning. Please bring a copy of it to the meeting tomorrow and we will discuss it further from there.

Once again, thanks for your hard work and promptness! Remember this is a learning process, and we are all part of the Waltonian team!

Talk to you soon!

Ten Most pathetic movie stars that still have careers.

(In A - B -C Order)

1. Hayden Christensen

2. Tom Crusie

3. Kevin Costner

4. Keeanu Reeves

5. Denise Richards

6. Adam Sandler

7. Arnold Schwarzenegger

8. William Shatner

9. Sylvester Stalloan

10. John Claude Van dahm